Muddled in the Middle

Kelly, aspiring singer and past auditioner for American Idol once said that if you don’t “fit the part” or have a story the country will find interesting, you don’t make it.  I remember watching one year and seeing one girl in the round 1 or 2 phase having a great voice (better than others that made it, in my opinion), being told that American Idol had a certain image to keep and she didn’t fit it. She was a little overweight. I have seen goths, wiccans, ska, and men looking like women (see my article on Skinny Jeans for Men), but that girl “didn’t fit the mold.”   Is this our only cut-off? If we are so desperate to be Lady Gaga’s “little monsters” and tell the world, “We were born this way,” then why do we still have these judgement calls? 

Is it just me? Am I the only one disturbed by this? First of all, a baby would never allow all those strings to remain tied. Second....leopard print???  Now, it is a little funny that the bottom has to be made so big as to fit over the baby’s diaper, but come on.  Just to show you I did do some research, you can check it out yourself at babybikini.com.  Now, the goal of this site is not to draw your attention to horrors and gaze in wonder at how messed up it is. That’s what gossip columns do. This, friends, is a call to action. This is to point out a true American Morality Fail.

sweetjanespopboutique.blogspot.co It’s true. Here’s the FAIL that started it all, a Bratz doll. When I first saw these ladies, I was horrified. Now, I highlight my hair on occasion, and her wedges do look startlingly familiar. But the half shoulder dress with a “Twiggy-esque” hemline and extra seductive eyes and makeup?  I’m not sure of the intended age-group for this product (trust me, I searched the product website), but my guess is that these are for age 6-10. The website, bratz.com, introduces you to the whole gang: Yasmine, Chloe, Jade, and Sasha--not your typical Tiffany, Jennifer, and Ashley. I’m not going to give a history of doll names over time (Barbie definitly didn’t make it through the 1980s), but I’m pretty sure these names were not chosen for their modern popularity.  tattoopins.com equinceanera.com Accessories you can add are wigs with a different style and hair color and a feather boa. Bratz we...

howilostmymancard.com Yeah, I know male photograpers have inducted Skinny Jeans as their official garb, but remember the time before it existed? Remember what photographers wore then? Are remember how they were still artsy and cool?   I don’t know if it’s the lack of role models or what, but someone needs to show today’s men how to dress like men. No more Beiber hairstyles to the side-swoop, no more skinny jeans and no more V-neck shirts. Like, forever.  I lived in China for a year and apparently, it has become really popular for guys to be really skinny, pale, and have really spiked-out hair. Sound familiar? Yes, it’s modeled after Japanation--Japanese animation characters like Dragon Balls Z. My Chinese friend explained to me that girls like this style (the guy looking pale and sickly) because they can feel needed, like the guy needs her to nurse him back to health. Is this what we want???

Photo from http://dangerousintersection.org The book Every Woman’s Battle , less-known counterpart to the wildly successful Every Man’s Battle, cited romance novels as women’s version of porn. I could see that. I mean, let’s be honest, women love to believe that a ridiculously gorgeous man who happens to be Ripped, Rich, and Real with you (yes, the three R’s) could totally happen upon your life suddenly and fall madly in love with you.  I know, the Twilight Series is not listed in the Teen Romance section of any bookstore. But the same idea follows, he is obsessingly baffled by her (every girls’ dream) and can’t stay away (even while she sleeps) and oh yeah, he’s always asking what she’s thinking about because he can read everyone’s mind but hers (convenient). Doesn’t every girl dream to have a guy begging to know what she’s thinking about?? Ladies, look for a Comm major. My husband is the best listener I’ve ever met-- even when I’m talking about my hair.   ...

This photo from giantbomb.com perfectly emulates the mentality of GTA: "See no evil, speak no evil, hear no evil." This kick-starts a new section of my blog, American Morality FAIL . This are just things I've observed that I can't believe ever got started! My goal is not to complain, but to challenge America to a higher order of entertainment, fashion, whatever! The first FAIL: the video game, Grand Theft Auto.   When one of my friends first saw this game in college, she was embarrassed to be present as a woman. At that particular moment, some big-wig of the city was inviting a prostitute into his car (in order to increase his health), after that car had just run down numerous citizens and cops for points. You watch them do their thing for a long, awkward moment and the game continues with its other objectives: assassinations, street racing, drug-dealing, and drunk-driving. Before continuing, however, you can kill the prostitute to get your money back. The ...